I am Duncan Phebus Sumo Mercutius Steerpike Campbell King, Litigator extraordinaire and I do not want you to like me.
Saturday, 28 November 2009
Fucking I do not care what shit your neddy (read scally or chavish) unholy off spring is spouting that makes it absolutely necessary to walk 4 abreast down the street, however, while the 20 or so people in front of me, sundry grannies, the disabled, polite unconfrontational people, will tut in their heads and walk on the road to dodge round you I am going straight through.
I do not give a flying fuck how 'rude' you overindulged, scrounging, pavement hogging cunts think this is, I am bigger and likely crazier than you so, in the words of the famous philosopher Eminem, I just don't give a fuck!
I eat too much, I swear too much, I hit too many children with a stout stick and I poke too many old ladies out of the way as they shuffle forth to their respective doom. Arguably (though not by me) I drown too many women too.